Reclaiming my life and self one step and one adventure at a time.
Monday, October 17, 2011
I have always loved fall because I liked school. Summer was fun but after a while, the classroom called and I wanted to go back. As an educator, I still feel that way. Autumn for me was a new beginning. The glorious oranges, scarlets, yellows against the blue sky just made me feel happy. When the colors began to change, I'd tell Mark, "Oh, the trees are turning!" He'd make a little spinning motion with his finger and say, "Yep, they're rotating alright."
Can I still like fall now that there is this enormous loss and sorrow associated with it? I hope so. This beautiful season is when he was liberated from his suffering imposed by cruel cancer. I have to think of it like that.
It's been a week and a day. I am numb and busy. After the cards stop coming, people stop calling, the work is done, then what?
Who will I be?